Big Band Swing & Frank Sinatra

I'm adopted. I've always known - since I was a little kid. It really spawned a lot of abandonment issues for me as a young kid all the way through my adult life... Shoulda, coulda, woulda says: If it would have been my choice, I, as a parent adopting a child, would maybe have done it differently.
But, when I think about it, I'm not sure how I would go about that. I, for one, would prefer that (in an open adoption setting) the mother be involved in the childs life.

As I discussed previously, my fiance and I are dealing with infertility. Because of this, we have looked at a variety of options from InVitro Fertilization, sperm donors, surrogacy and adoption. As a couple, we really had to sit down and discuss our options and the "what if's" and other questiobs that come before having fertility testing done.

What if it's me that's "broken"? What if it's him? What if fertility treatments turn out to not be an option? How are we going to look at treatment options; affordability or just try anything regardless of cost? What if it just isn't going to happen for us?

Let me tell you, all this shit is upsetting to us both. I mean, for fuck's sake, we can't even afford a 'traditional' wedding, nor will any financial institution loan to us!

It's usually at this point I flip on my music. Lately it has been the new Casting Crowns CD - Come To The Well (it's amazing! Go buy it!). But it used to be and from time to time still is big band swing or Frank Sinatra style music like Micheal Buble (love him!).
All my life music has played an important role. More so because my eldest brother is now a highschool band director (and a damn good one!). But turns out that as an infant, before being adopted, my mother used to play Sinatra for me because it was the only thing to soothe my cholicy ass. Which explains a lot about my love for music as an adult. :)

If you or someone you know is struggling, nothing can change a mood faster than music. I don't know ONE person that can keep a straight face while listening to Hansen's "mmm bop".

Cheer up today. Pop in that old CD or tape from highschool and rock out to songs that now make you dance like nobody's watching.

Do it.

I dare you!